tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-63878043427255960762024-02-07T20:20:19.515-06:00Agape DreamsI am a the Program Director at a camp in Kansas. This blog is where my heart writes about life. God's love is perfect and unconditional, and my heart strives for and dreams for that kind of love. My life is ministry.Darci Uhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10026788615841665149noreply@blogger.comBlogger191125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6387804342725596076.post-11139485235783189112022-12-02T10:00:00.000-06:002022-12-02T10:00:05.467-06:00Advent Season: God is in This Story<p> The season of Advent is my favorite time of year. I love everything about it. The anticipation for Christ, Advent Calendars, Christmas Decorations, Advent Studies, and where my devotional heart goes this time of year. This season I am teaching a Bible Study on the book of Matthew, and doing an Advent Study using some of the women from the Bible. Week 1 is the story of Tamar. Never would I have chosen her to start a study that leads to Christ, and yet for that reason, she is the perfect place to start. </p><p>Tamar has a very broken story in the Bible. She is married to one of Judah's sons. He is not a good man and doesn't treat her well, God takes care of him. Then in Jewish tradition, she is married to his brother, and the story is much the same. He refuses to give her children because he doesn't want his brother to get credit for any sons. So God takes care of him too. Leaving her a widow x2. Judah sends her home to live a widow's life until the third son is old enough to marry her. Time passes and he never fulfills his promise. She takes matters into her own hands and tricks Judah into sleeping with her. She gets pregnant and with this child enters the lineage of Jesus Christ. </p><p>In Youth Group we talked about the different characters in the Christmas Story. The figurines we set on our mantle this time of year in our Nativities. </p><p></p><ul style="text-align: left;"><li>Shepherds: This wasn't a job that essential people held. It was a job for the least of these, they lived with the sheep and would have been dirty and smelly.</li><li>Magi: These guys weren't even Jewish. They didn't believe in God or follow any belief system that looks like Jesus. They likely believed in magic and astrology, they were tracking stars. Definitely outsiders. </li><li>Joseph: a carpenter, nothing too special. Just a man willing to live by his convictions over the law.</li><li>Mary: a young, virgin, betrothed, yet pregnant. </li></ul><div>In Matthew 1 we find the lineage of Jesus, these people were considered an important part of his story. Lineages were used to show how important someone was, and they typically leave out any of the black sheep of the family. We find Tamar, Rahab, Bathsheba, and many more that have a history not fit for the King of Kings. </div><div><br /></div><div>If you break any part of the story of Christ apart you find brokenness, but when we put it all together and read the story as a whole we find love and grace. God could have chosen anyone and any way to bring the promised Messiah, he could have chosen the best of the best to be a part of Jesus' story. But he didn't. He chose broken sinful humans, and by choosing them he redeemed their stories.</div><div><br /></div><div>Week one of Advent is Hope. These characters, these people bring us hope. There is nothing that we can go through in this life that writes us out of Christ's story. </div><div><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;">God loves us in our stinky shepherd clothes. </div><div style="text-align: center;">God loves us even when we look to the stars to fix our problems.</div><div style="text-align: center;">God loves us when we are ordinary people living ordinary lives.</div><div style="text-align: center;">God loves us when we are called beyond the world's standards and the deck is stacked against us.</div><div style="text-align: center;">God loves us when we come from broken marriages and homes.</div><div style="text-align: center;">God loves us when no one else does. </div><div style="text-align: center;">God loves us when we take matters into our own hands.</div><div style="text-align: center;">God loves us when we sin majorly and cause others pain. </div><div style="text-align: center;">God loves us on the mountaintops.</div><div style="text-align: center;">God loves us in the valleys. </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;">The world doesn't define your story. God does. When we are stuck in the middle of something ugly and painful it is hard to see any good in the story. But God is there, and he is molding those moments into His story with love and grace. Don't lose heart, God is in THIS story.</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="BLOG_video_class" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/ryD3D9X2myk" width="320" youtube-src-id="ryD3D9X2myk"></iframe></div><div style="text-align: center;">God is in This Story - Katy Nichole & Big Daddy Weave</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><p></p>Darci Uhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10026788615841665149noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6387804342725596076.post-44057816141386072722020-03-30T16:47:00.001-05:002020-03-30T16:47:30.211-05:00Daycare: The First Day vs. The Last Day!The state of the crazy world brought this day a lot earlier than we had planned. On the plus side Camp Grandma is open and ready for play! <div><br></div><div>In January of 2018 we moved to Camp and Adah started attending Retana Care each day. Courtney and I were friends in school and this was the only place I could imagine sending my child when we moved back to AC! There are no words to say to thank someoneel for loving your child like their own!</div><div><br></div><div>What Adah has learned:</div><div>* No biting! This was one of our first big hurtles. And I was mortified and had no clue what to do with a biter. But Courtney was patient and loved and coached her through it.</div><div>* How to go to the same place every day and not get bored. Before this Adah went somewhere different every day.</div><div>*How to be nice and share. This is still a work in progress but she has come leaps and bounds while being at Courtney's.</div><div>*How to have multiple friends.</div><div>*How to insert herself into group play that has already started.</div><div>*How to eat what everyone else is eating, or at least mostly!</div><div>*How to interact with babies and children younger than her.</div><div>*How to not be the center of everyone's attention.</div><div>*How to stay quiet at nap time even if you aren't sleepy.</div><div>*Adah became potty trained in this time with Courtney. </div><div><br></div><div>There are so many more lessons and things that Courtney reinforced for us on a daily basis. It is such a blessing as a parent to send your child somewhere so you can work and know that they are not just being watched but loved and nurtured.</div><div><br></div><div>We will forever be grateful for Courtney and her family for loving our stubborn amd sweet Adah Grace!</div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</div>From barely 2 to 4! Adah's first day and today when we said goodbye! Thank you Miss Courtney!</div>Darci Uhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10026788615841665149noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6387804342725596076.post-1583327458687595622020-03-29T20:44:00.001-05:002020-03-29T20:54:39.130-05:00See a Victory! At the beginning of this Lenten season I decided I wanted to write more and use songs to do it. I did this for almost a week and then got really sick. Since then it has been hard to get back to doing any of the things I had planned to devote myself to. <div> </div><div>Then the whole world went into chaos with this pandemic. Now we are supposed to stay home and distance ourselves and we should have a healthy fear in our hearts so we don't touch our faces. </div><div><br></div><div>Well this past week or two has been a pure nightmare for many. Toilet paper is a hot commodity, medical personnel can't get the protective supplies they need, famous people have even died from this, birthdays are lonely, and you can't go visit anyone! It would be so easy to sit inside on social media and fill my heart with fear and sorrow. I could focus on the jobs that are lost and the freedom that seems to be stolen. </div><div><br></div><div>But today was none of that. And tonight this song was the first one that played while I washed the mud from my feet.</div><div><br></div><div><a href="https://youtu.be/jEK6_rz26z0">See a Victory</a> has the most perfect words for today. "I am gonna worship my way through this battle. You take what the enemy meant for evil and turn it for good!"<br></div><div><br></div><div>Enemy: churches are closed! </div><div>God: let's worship online! (This morning I worshipped online with people 3 times my age all the way down to a 3 year old!)</div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</div></div><div>People that have been scared of technology are now using it in bold ways to meet with those they love!</div><div><br></div><div>Enemy: you must stay home!</div><div>God: here is some sunshine, go play! </div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</div><br><br></div><div><br></div><div>Enemy: you must stay 6 feet away from everyone so you don't get sick.</div><div>God: you have a 4 year old!</div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</div><br></div><div><br></div><div>Enemy: You can't go anywhere! And you live in a tiny little cabin!</div><div>God: You live at camp!</div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</div><br></div><div><br></div><div>We live in an incredible time. We can see people without leaving our house. We can shop online. And we can be entertained, educated, and work from home. We live in a high speed, instant kind of world and we were all just given the gift of slowing down. So take a deep breath, follow the directions of the CDC, and accept this gift of a slower pace. Go outside, get muddy, play hard, do the things you never have time to, read, catch up on your shows, be crafty, make food...whatever it is the fuels you. Worship, pray, sing, & dance! Don't let the enemy win! Use this time for good!</div><div><br></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</div><br></div>Darci Uhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10026788615841665149noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6387804342725596076.post-80311754916358425462020-03-19T14:32:00.000-05:002020-03-19T14:32:11.334-05:00Where Two or More are Gathered....Growing up in Children's Church my grandmother always quoted the scripture "Where two or more are gathered in my name, there I will be also." Matthew 18:20.<br />
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I woke up this morning thinking about this scripture. Grandma has been gone now for 3 months and she still has this ability to speak wisdom into my life. This week it seems as if our whole world has exploded into chaos. Going to the store is not suggested and you can't find anything you need anyway, people are working from home and all gatherings of ten or more have been cancelled across the country. There has been a lot on social media from news, to panic, memes, blatant meanness, and scripture...you name it someone has reacted in that way.<br />
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As the world is freaking out about toilet paper, and hunkering down, separating from everyone....It would be so incredibly easy to live in fear. This really reminds me of the days after 9/11 and the days after we went to war on terror. And other times in history where our need to control our world actually creates insane chaos.<br />
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I don't know if it is living and working at a Church Camp that has completely calmed spirit over the years, maturity, or my ever growing walk with Christ. But I have complete peace in all of this until I am completely alone. I am asthmatic, so there is a piece of me that is nervous in this virus pandemic. It could be really bad for me. Yesterday I enjoyed the quietness of camp as it was it empty and enjoyed the peaceful moments of motherhood. But once she was asleep and I was alone....I got nervous. I was riding my exercise bike and wheezing....and my brain immediately went to what if this is the virus. Not to the fact that it is spring and I have never been able to breath as things bloom. So this morning when I woke....a little clearer minded. I heard in my heart, "where two or more are gathered."<br />
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As a kid I always wondered what happens when you're alone....does God not join you when you are by yourself? How rude!!! When I am alone that is when I need the presence of God the most. Hey God, what is up with this verse in the Bible?! What about all of these people who are quarantined alone right now...you're just gonna leave them to their own devises?<br />
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Obviously when I am alone, my very powerful mind takes over! So in this internal conversation this morning, the response was again, "Where two or more are gathered!" And then it hit....I'm not alone when I ask the Spirit to be with me. I automatically then went to Grandma's and my favorite poem...the footprints poem. When there is only one set of footprints that is when God carries us. Oof....talk about conviction first thing in the morning!<br />
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I'm not alone when I ride my bike in the evening, I'm not alone when I can't go to the store, I'm not alone when the internet and the news run rampant. I'm not alone, unless I want to be. I can push the Spirit away. I can refuse to let the Spirit control my thoughts and desires. I can choose to be vulnerable, scared, and lonely. Or I can choose to let the Spirit in, and let God be in my thoughts, and my moments, and my days.<br />
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Toilet paper may be a scarce commodity right now, and your loved ones may be miles away. But God is only as far away as you want Him to be. If you are feeling isolated and abandoned, you're doing the pushing...not the other way around! Your mind is the most powerful tool you have, use it wisely.<br />
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"For where two or more are gathered, in My name, there I will be also!" - Jesus<br />
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Darci Uhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10026788615841665149noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6387804342725596076.post-59784507745269646152020-03-04T22:45:00.001-06:002020-03-04T22:45:58.179-06:00Day 7: Even If<div>As I have spent time thinking about the purpose behind this daily song blog and what it is I want to share, I have come up with some criteria for the daily song. It must meet one or more of these.</div><div>1. At some point during the it has caught my attention and I can't quit thinking about.</div><div>2. It is a new song by someone I have never heard of and it speaks to me.</div><div>3. It applies to something in my life today.</div><div>4. It is a significant song from some part of my life.</div><div><br></div><div>The first one is probably the hardest and that is where the first few songs came from. But today I land with #4, a song that is significant to a specific time of my life.</div><div><br></div><div>In 2017, on Easter morning my dad was taken by ambulance and was bleeding internally and they couldn't figure out where. In the midst of the other turmoil in my life, my father came close to death a couple times and was in the hospital for almost 6 weeks. This song hit the radio during this time. And I remember be struck to tears because I knew in my heart at any moment God could answer my prayer and heal my father and return him to teaching and being Grandpa. I also knew that God could choose not to, or He could heal my father and take him home with Him. </div><div><br></div><div>Just like I knew that He could give my husband a job, heal my broken heart, make my child sleep at night, and make my budget work. God could do all the things I asked and He could choose not to. </div><div><br></div><div>This season was so intense. My finances were as low as my father's hemoglobin and much like we couldn't find where he was bleeding we couldn't find a second source income.</div><div><br></div><div>This song was played on repeat and through tear filled prayers I fought so I could say It Is Well! Through all of it my soul was ok, my soul found rest in God. </div><div><br></div><div>And today, 3 years later in a season that always makes me hug my dad a little tighter I can tell you all the ways God answered those prayers. </div><div><br></div><div>And as I am battling my own stomach issues that are sure to hit me in the finances in a way that has me nervous, this song still brings me peace. Because there will always be something to break the budget, but I refuse to let my world spiral and I know that through all of it God is in control and if He doesn't move my mountain than the climb must be part of my journey.</div><div><br></div><div>No matter what your <a href="https://youtu.be/B6fA35Ved-Y">Even If</a> statement is tonight, I pray you can see and feel that God has you and can sing deep down in the depths of your soul, "It is well, with my soul!"</div><div><br></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</div>this picture is from June 2017, I remember being emotional being able to take this picture, because just 2 months before we weren't sure this would happen again!</div><div><br></div><div><div><div><div><div>***Adah's lent: I am asking her each day what she wants to thank God for, what was her favorite thing that day!</div><div>Day 1: being able to talk!</div></div><div>Day 2: for Nicole's foster daughter being in our life and her upcoming birthday! </div><div>Day 3: for the balance beam and fun activities at daycare! </div></div><div>Day 4: for Nicole's foster daughter and her birthday party!</div></div><div>Day 5: Mommy forgot to ask.</div><div>Day 6: for Daddy!</div></div><div>Day 7: Mommy forgot to ask.</div>Darci Uhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10026788615841665149noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6387804342725596076.post-77844187340272017502020-03-03T19:22:00.000-06:002020-03-03T20:13:00.960-06:00Day 6: Oceans (Where Feet May Fail)<div>Today's song is known at my house as <a href="https://youtu.be/6GGFb6LcX3U">Mommy's Song</a>. For a long time this song was the final song I played while rocking Adah to sleep. Daddy's song is "Sweet Child of Mine." Many nights I sang this song to Adah with a tear filled heart, wondering why God had called me to a place where clearly my feet had failed and where I felt as if I was drowning. </div><div><br></div><div>There was a season in our life that was so dark and painful. It was hard to see that there was ever going to be a brighter day.</div><div><br></div><div>Now being in a totally different place in life the lyrics of this song hang on my wall and I smile knowing that God called me to this life and through all of it He has guided me through. </div><div><br></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</div>2017 was the middle of our storm. 2020 we are on the other side. There isn't an easy way to do a life side by side picture. But we have grown just about as much as she has!</div><div><br></div><div><br></div><div><div><div><div>***Adah's lent: I am asking her each day what she wants to thank God for, what was her favorite thing that day!</div><div>Day 1: being able to talk!</div></div><div>Day 2: for Nicole's foster daughter being in our life and her upcoming birthday! </div><div>Day 3: for the balance beam and fun activities at daycare! </div></div><div>Day 4: for Nicole's foster daughter and her birthday party!</div></div><div>Day 5: for Daddy!</div>Darci Uhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10026788615841665149noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6387804342725596076.post-87076616056107516592020-03-02T18:42:00.001-06:002020-03-02T19:10:02.798-06:00Day 5: ER VisitWell my goal to write each day for lent was squandered Sunday morning. One could attest that Sunday's don't count during lent, but my streak was broken with another round of stomach illness. This was unlike any I have experienced and at 7am Sunday morning I cried from the bathroom for my husband to call my parents. My entire abdomen was on fire and had been for over an hour. <div><br></div><div>If you know me, you know that I hate going to the dr, I will be the first to drive you there, but if it isn't broken, there is no blood and I can still see straight I will probably find a reason not to go. A week ago I went to urgent care for the first time ever for myself. I had a viral stomach thing and 24 hours later I was back to normal. Adah had battled something similar for about two weeks and then Adam fought it too. </div><div><br></div><div>We had a normal week and even went to a bday bowling party. But about bedtime the symptoms came rushing back. I found myself ill an hour away from home. When my stomach settled, something in me said we had to go home, staying would be really bad. So I broke Adah's heart and ended our sleepover. She slept the whole way home and I drove and prayed. I just needed to make it back to my house. About Winfield the nauseous feeling and all illness left, we made it home and I transferred Adah to her bed and settled in with a show and my own bed.</div><div><br></div><div>About 2am it all began again but this time it came with a firey vengeance. I was able to get a little bit of sleep as long as I stayed curled in a ball, but the moment I would stretch out the pain, fire, and symptoms all returned. Each time was worse than the one before. By 7, I was barely able to stand and could not help but to cry. So my parents came and assured me this was the correct time to go to the ER. Thankfully it wasn't too busy and I got right in. </div><div><br></div><div>They gave me a GI Cocktail which numbed everything and took care of the burning and eventually I was able to not stay curled in a ball. </div><div><br></div><div>They diagnosed a combo of Gastroenteritis & Gastroesophageal Reflux Disease. And sent me home to rest with a couple new prescriptions. </div><div><br></div><div>Today, I have slept most of it. Eaten some, everything I have swallowed today feels like it is stuck in my chest. Thankfully no fire and no real pain. </div><div><br></div><div>So if in doubt, call your mom! She'll reassure your thought that you need to go to the ER! Thanks Mom!</div><div><br></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</div>sleeping all day is better with this guy!</div>Darci Uhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10026788615841665149noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6387804342725596076.post-67420766364084853712020-02-29T22:24:00.000-06:002020-02-29T22:24:28.532-06:00Day 4: Holy Water<div>Today was a fun family day. We celebrated my neice's birthday with a bowling party. This was so much fun. Adah had never been bowling, she didn't even know what it was. She managed to the slowest ball ever! And two kids lane hopped their balls. It was quite humorous and the kids had a blast! And I brought home a sleeping 4 year old exhausted from all the fun!</div><div><br></div><div>Today's song is a special one! It is pretty popular on Christian radio and every time it comes on, Adah begs me to turn it up, and she sings along. Today she even wanted it on repeat. This song is musically interesting and bone chilling, then the vocals come in and bam, you can't focus on anything else. This is the kind of song that I can't help but listen to over and over and I want to share with the world. I am loving that for this particular one Adah agrees and we must turn it up!</div><div><br></div><div>So please check out <a href="https://youtu.be/l0xhhG1Hyos">Holy Water</a> by We the Kingdom! </div><div><br></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</div></div><div>For timing reference, it took 3 snapchat videos to send one shot to her daddy!</div><div><br></div><div><div><div>***Adah's lent: I am asking her each day what she wants to thank God for, what was her favorite thing that day!</div><div>Day 1: being able to talk!</div></div><div>Day 2: for Nicole's foster daughter being in our life and her upcoming birthday! </div><div>Day 3: for the balance beam and fun activities at daycare! </div></div><div>Day 4: for Nicole's foster daughter and her birthday party! </div>Darci Uhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10026788615841665149noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6387804342725596076.post-41665865065500157302020-02-28T20:25:00.000-06:002020-02-28T20:25:03.848-06:00Day 3: Rejoice"This is where my peace comes from<br>Immovable One, unshakeable God<br>There's freedom where I place my trust"<div><br></div><div>These words got me this morning. This is so where my heart has been this year. I feel like my spiritual roots are expanding drastically. My prayer is to always be able to rejoice and to have an unshakable faith, because I have an unshakable God!</div><div><br></div><div>Check out this amazing <a href="https://youtu.be/RQc_sJCFoyA">song</a>.</div><div><br></div><div><br></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</div><br></div><div><div><div>***Adah's lent: I am asking her each day what she wants to thank God for, what was her favorite thing that day!</div><div>Day 1: being able to talk!</div></div><div>Day 2: for Nicole's foster daughter being in our life and her upcoming birthday! </div><div>Day 3: for the balance beam and fun activities at daycare! </div></div>Darci Uhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10026788615841665149noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6387804342725596076.post-32552480914138410792020-02-27T20:43:00.000-06:002020-02-27T20:43:55.262-06:00Day 2: Kingdom ComeToday, I had a lot of time to listen to music. I had a couple if much needed soul meeting in Wichita and spent my day drinking coffee, discussing Jesus, the world, parenting, being married, and the season of Lent.<div><br></div><div>This was much needed for my soul, I didn't even realize it. I am feeling convicted this Lent season like I have never been before. I have spent a lot of time the past couple of years working on my whole self. Spiritual and physical growth have been major for me! Recently I have dove into finances and find myself today convicted in my home life! This season I am working on being a better mother and wife. Patience and Grace seem to have ran away from our humble abode and it is time to reestablish them. </div><div><br></div><div>This season I want to put to rest my need to yell. I want to approach my house like I do everything else in my life, as a calling and with Grace. Tonight this came to a test during shower time. Adah was bound and determined not to take one. And tonight I can say that I didn't cave and I didn't yell. And over all it feels better, and even though she had tears, I am going to bed tonight not focused on how crappy this situation made me feel but instead on the positives of the night!</div><div><br></div><div>So tonight my song is <a href="https://youtu.be/Ug9rHTRpLcw">Kingdom Come</a> and my prayer is that my house will look more and more like God's kingdom during this Lenten season!</div><div><br></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</div>Thanks Erica for the awesome new mug!</div><div><br></div><div><div>***Adah's lent: I am asking her each day what she wants to thank God for, what was her favorite thing that day!</div><div>Day 1: being able to talk!</div></div><div>Day 2: for Nicole's foster daughter being in our life and her upcoming birthday! </div><div><br></div><div><br></div><div><br></div>Darci Uhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10026788615841665149noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6387804342725596076.post-71083968264227721452020-02-26T21:33:00.001-06:002020-02-26T21:33:52.495-06:00Day 1: I Don't Have MuchThis Ash Wednesday has me pondering the best ways for me to spend my time and energy this Lenten season. I have always looked to this season for discipline, reconnection, and rekindling of the flame within. <div><br></div><div>Today this song came on my Spotify, and it seemed like the perfect mantra for me during this time. It isn't about the things I can give up or the sacrifices I can make, but how my heart beats for Christ. So one of the ways I am focusing this season is to write and listen to music. This has always been a connection point for me and in the chaos of motherhood it has dwindled.</div><div><br></div><div>So 40 days, 40 songs, 40 blog posts! </div><div>Here is the video to hear this beautiful <a href="https://youtu.be/F6MrkHoTYJE">song</a>. </div><div><br></div><div>I don't have much, but I have a heart that beats for you!</div><div><br></div><div><br></div><div><br></div><div><br></div><div>***Adah's lent: I am asking her each day what she wants to thank God for, what was her favorite thing that day!</div><div>Day 1: being able to talk!</div><div><br></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br>For Grandma's Service: December 13, 2019<br>
Grandma Jo! What do you even say about the person who ignited a wildfire, not only in my soul but so many others? She will never know just how much of a blessing it was for me to grow up in the pew next to her. In these walls (St. Paul UMC) she was so much more than MY Grandma Jo, she was everyone's. Each Sunday she would take all of the children upstairs, gifting their parents a sermon free from parenting stress. The children were gifted so much more. For years that spanned more than I knew, Grandma was teaching the young people in this church how to be the church, know the Jesus, know scripture, and how to love like Jesus.<br>
When I was my daughter's age. I couldn't wait to be big like my cousins so I could sit in those little pews. Once I got there, a fire started in my soul. To this day I crave to learn more, memorize more, sing louder, and care deeper. Club cracker & apple juice communion will always be sacred to me. Lighting the advent candles, songs with actions, memorizing verses, sharing joys & concerns, singing Go Tell it On the Mountain, not running in the church, and definitely NEVER wearing a hat in the building were all just the surface of what she taught us in those pews. I took those lessons and tucked them deep inside and that flame fueled a life in ministry for me and a life of loving and serving deeply for all of us.<br>
Grandma like to give worry stones to people. A small rock with a cross that you can hold and rub while you say a prayer. Her life was never easy, but we never saw her worry, instead she prayed. Rocks are mentioned several times in the Bible. And like Peter was the rock the church was built on. Grandma was the rock this family was built on. And she made sure we knew that Christ was the only rock on which we would stand.<br>
Matthew 7:24-25 "Anyone who listens to my teaching and follows it is wise, like a person who builds a house on solid rock. Though the rain comes in torrents and the flood waters rise and the winds beat against the house, it won't collapse because it is built on bedrock."<br>
There are worry stones for each of you to take with you as you leave today. We hope they bring you peace and comfort like Grandma's hugs and remind you to turn to the rock eternal today, and everyday!<br>
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December 19, 2019<br>
Grandma has been gone for a whole week. It has been the little things that have stopped me in my tracks the most. To think about the legacy this woman left is overwhelming. She is in everything, everywhere I go. Every part of my day has a piece of her in it. From the cross around my neck, the rock in my pocket, the plants in the office, the puzzle picture on the wall, to driving by her building, sharing her middle name, to the tears in my daughters eyes.<br>
This morning out of no where on the way to town, Adah started crying. This has happened a lot in the past week. When I asked her what was wrong she said, "I miss Grandma! Why did she have to died?" I responded, "I miss her too, it was her turn to be called to Heaven to live with Jesus, remember she is happy now, she isn't in pain or sick anymore." Adah said "I know, but I can't hug her anymore. I have never been to Heaven." Through tears I said, "I know sweetheart, her hugs were the best, and we can't visit Heaven it doesn't work like that. Just remember she is with Jesus and Grandpa and she so very happy now!" "Look mom, an airplane!" And just like that we moved on to the excitement of airplanes in the sky, Baby Jesus in front of someone's house, and driving over the train tracks. She has moved on with her day at daycare and I was left stuck in the tears of loss. So, emotionally wounded I sit at my desk, inspired to finally write down my feelings, while listening to Casting Crowns and remembering all the good things.<br>
Grandma Jo has left the most incredible legacy behind. She had 5 children, 15 grandchildren, and 19 great grandchildren. This doesn't include the spouses and all of the extras who are as much family as those who share her DNA. She instilled in all of us hard work, stubbornness, and loving and serving people. She loved Jesus with every ounce of who she was, even on her last night she was studying His word. Her knowledge and love that she shared so freely with us came from her own desire to know and love Him more. She was always interested in what I was learning in college, and then when I moved on to full time ministry she wanted to know what I was teaching. She made the trip to watch the first Christmas Program I led, and I was so humbled trying to fill her shoes. I used her creepy Baby Jesus, and was offended when my youth called it that! Grandma went with me to college, to camp, to Hesston, to Derby, and back to camp. This week I have wanted nothing more than to wear her Moomoo, eat waffles, play farkel, and give her a hug.<br>
Instead I find myself marveling at how much she resembled her name sake in the Bible, Naomi. A widow at a young age, with a rough rode ahead of her, she could have stayed in a world of bitterness, and allowed the world to know her as Mara, but instead she focused on love and raised her five children, worked harder than anyone I know to make sure they never needed anything. She loved each one of her grandchildren as if they were the only one. We each have our own stories of her and they are all so beautiful. She was the most blessed great grandma as she welcomed each one into the family and loved them fiercely. These past few years have been really hard on her health, she battled leukemia and won and a lot people in her life didn't even know, because she didn't dwell on it. Her stubbornness carried her through a house fire, broken arm, and a UTI all this year. And then when she was feeling better than she had in a long time, sound mind, and content heart, she went to sleep in this life and woke up in the life eternal. She finally celebrated an anniversary with Grandpa after 42 years apart. And I imagine her in awe of the God of all her days as she is surrounded by perfect peace.<br>
I know I will continue to be stopped in my tracks, the tears will fall, and my almost four year old will continue to ask why she can't have a Grandma Jo hug, but I can't stay here in this grief. Because I am a part of her legacy. I am part of what she left behind. And her dream for all of us was to love and know her Jesus. She wanted us to be on fire for him, serve him, turn to him, and most importantly know him like she did.<br>
He is the God of all My Days, and I want the world to know me like they knew her, for Loving My Jesus!<br>
We love you and miss you Grandma! Thank you for making us your legacy! <3<br>
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<br>Darci Uhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10026788615841665149noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6387804342725596076.post-55030933319262248862019-08-02T21:03:00.001-05:002019-08-02T21:03:49.851-05:00We Are the Laborers in Your Vineyard...We are the laborers in your vineyard, declaring the Word of the Lord. This is a line from one of our beloved camp songs. Tonight as we wrapped up our summer with dinner, awards, and worship this line struck me. Our 21 counselors belted this with all they had, before saying goodbye and heading down from this mountain top. This summer I was blessed to tend to this flock as they poured their hearts and souls into campers for nine weeks. Nine weeks, 1241 kids, countless moments sharing God's love. These college students could have chosen to do anything with their summer. They chose to go into the Lord's vineyard and work to plant seeds, bear fruit, prune vines, & prepare for the harvest.<br />
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In May when they got here they were twenty one individuals from twelve different campuses, tonight they are the family that is the Horizon Staff of 2019. They have lived together, fought together, served together, loved together, changed together, & grown together.<br />
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When you give up yourself & your summer to come to church camp you can't help but walk away changed. The lives you come into connection with, the hearts you watch change, the walls that crumble, the faces, the memories, the moments, they stay with you forever. This group came together like none I have seen before. They were instantly friends, they played long and hard together, and they tackled each day as if it were the only one they got. I watched them grown, break, and rebuild this summer, individually and together.<br />
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This summer was so much more than water balloons, messy games, hikes, dance parties, and Chaco tans. This summer was about the campers, which in turn made this summer about the counselors. In doing the good, hard work which is summer camp, they did the good, hard work which is personal and spiritual growth.<br />
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Lord, thank you for bringing this group together. Thank you for providing this space and time for this group to come together and serve you. Lord, please hold each one of them tight as they leave this sacred place. Help them to know you and serve you each and every day. Make your path known to them so they can live into your call for their lives. Remind them daily that they are loved, cherished, chosen, and here for a purpose! Amen!<br />
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This summer we were "Broken Vessels" that "Just Want(ed) to be a Sheep." We remembered "The Days of Elijah" and the day that "Death Was Arrested." Lord, you became the "King of My Heart" and "My Lighthouse." "Come Now is the Time to Worship" as we breathe the "Holy Spirit" and remember we are "Who You say I am." "This is Amazing Grace" please "Build Your Kingdom Here"Darci Uhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10026788615841665149noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6387804342725596076.post-52869851927882232982019-07-23T22:08:00.000-05:002019-07-23T22:08:17.180-05:00Loving My Jesus<span style="font-family: inherit;">Wow, it has been a long time since I have written on here! I used to have all kinds of inspiration and words to write. I think it is safe to say that this season of Motherhood has taken my free moments when I used to create words! :) </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Tonight I have just felt off, not sick and nothing really wrong, just off. Tonight as I rocked Adah before bed, she decided to randomly pick a different song than we normally rock to. She selected "Loving My Jesus" by Casting Crowns. Now the chorus is stuck in my head, and here I sit in the office typing!</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">These are the words playing in my heart tonight, </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-size: 17px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Loving my Jesus</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-size: 17px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Showing my scars</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-size: 17px; white-space: pre-wrap;">Telling my </span><a href="https://www.definitions.net/definition/story" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #222222; font-size: 17px; text-decoration-line: none; white-space: pre-wrap;">story</a><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-size: 17px; white-space: pre-wrap;"> of how mercy</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-size: 17px; white-space: pre-wrap;">Can </span><a href="https://www.definitions.net/definition/reach" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #222222; font-size: 17px; text-decoration-line: none; white-space: pre-wrap;">reach</a><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-size: 17px; white-space: pre-wrap;"> You </span><a href="https://www.definitions.net/definition/where" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #222222; font-size: 17px; text-decoration-line: none; white-space: pre-wrap;">where</a><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-size: 17px; white-space: pre-wrap;"> You are</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-size: 17px; white-space: pre-wrap;">And I pray the </span><a href="https://www.definitions.net/definition/whole" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #222222; font-size: 17px; text-decoration-line: none; white-space: pre-wrap;">whole</a><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-size: 17px; white-space: pre-wrap;"> world hears</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-size: 17px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">The cry of my heart</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-size: 17px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Is to see all the ones I love</span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-size: 17px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Loving my Jesus</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">This morning I had a chat with one of the counselors who is discerning his future and where God is calling him to be. This is one of my favorite parts of my job! During this conversation, I shared pieces of my own ministry journey, the highs and lows, and where I heard God calling loud and clear and where I sat in despair wondering if I misunderstood. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">It is so easy to stroll through life with a false confidence, looking and acting as if I have it all figured out. And yet the moments that I live for, are when I am able to be real and honest, which requires me to show my scars and flaws. Tonight this has me pondering how different this world would look, if we all showed our brokenness and used our scars to serve others? Why are we so scared to be our true selves? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Why do we put on the front of having it all together, when those around us are feeling things that we know so well? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">If more people were honest about how tough marriage is, would we have less divorces? If parents didn't feel so isolated in their exhaustion and stress, would more children have beds to sleep in and hugs and kisses? If more people were honest about how their bank account is empty and they are living on a prayer till pay day, would more people have full tummies and bills that are paid?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">We live in a nation that strives for perfection and having it all together. There isn't any part of the American Dream that shows a person battling mental health and still providing for their family. No, the American Dream shows us perfect people making lots of money, owning houses and cars, and perfect happy smiling families.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">I have a different dream. My dream for over a decade now has been Agape Dreams. God's Love in this world in deep, power, lasting ways. I really believe for this to happen we must be who we really are. In a transparent, #nofilter kind of way!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">What are your scars that God might be calling you to share with someone tonight? Could your rocky marriage save someone else from walking away? Could your tithing journey help someone out of debt? Could your years of parenting a stubborn sleepless child help a mother who is at her whit's end? Could your homesick, middle school self, convince a current middle school child to stay at camp just one more night? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">You have walked your journey, you have a purpose. Love your Jesus and share Him with those you love in the way that only you can! </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Ecclesiastes 3:11a "<span style="background-color: white; font-size: 16px;">He has made everything beautiful in its time.</span><span class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-17371A" data-link="(<a href="#cen-NIV-17371A" title="See cross-reference A">A</a>)" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 0.625em; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"></span><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 16px;"> He has also set eternity in the human heart;"</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 16px;">Romans 8:28 "</span><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 16px;">And we know that in all things God works for the good</span><span class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-28145A" data-link="(<a href="#cen-NIV-28145A" title="See cross-reference A">A</a>)" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 0.625em; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"></span><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 16px;"> of those who love him, who</span><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 10px;"> </span><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 16px;">have been called</span><span class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-28145B" data-link="(<a href="#cen-NIV-28145B" title="See cross-reference B">B</a>)" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 0.625em; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"></span><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 16px;"> according to his purpose."</span></span></div>
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Darci Uhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10026788615841665149noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6387804342725596076.post-65192102169890412802018-10-25T09:29:00.001-05:002018-10-25T09:29:13.262-05:00He is My Brother!To you he may be an annoyance as those flashing lights stop you from speeding down the highway when you're late for work.<br />
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To you he may be a long line of choice words because you've never met a cop that you can trust.<br />
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To you he may be a symbol of a group of people you hate.<br />
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To you he may be the one that separated your family and put someone you love in jail.<br />
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But to me...<br />
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That's my little brother, my first best friend, my first partner, my blood!<br />
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That's my niece's father, my mother's son, my daughter's uncle. That's my brother.<br />
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Every time I see a person in uniform, his is the face I see. There is more to that man than his badge. He belongs to someone, there are people praying that he just comes home alive. Every traffic stop and emergency that I see...I see my brother.<br />
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He is the man that will hold you and do CPR on you in your final hours, no matter how your life ended. He is the man who will race down the highway to help you. He is the man who will change your tire in the pouring rain. He is the man who will search endlessly when your child walked out the door and you don't know where. He is the man who will run into your house when all others would run out. He is the man willing to be the only thing standing between you and the greatest evil that has ever confronted you. He is the man who would take a bullet for you, you, a complete stranger. He is the man who would die to protect you and your family. He is that man, but first, he is my brother!<br />
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Every siren I here, sends chills through my soul. Every story on the news of a man/woman in blue who made their last call breaks my heart for days and brings tears to my eyes. Every badge I see, every Kevlar vest, every uniform, that's my brother!<br />
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Every Law Enforcement Officer is someone's loved one. They are Fathers and Mothers, Sisters and Brothers. They are someone's child, someone's friend, and someone will notice if they don't come home. Don't take them for granted, greet them with kindness and respect. Pray for them. They risk their lives daily for people they don't know. You may hate them when they pull you over, but you'll never know what they protected you from down the road, your speed could have killed someone.<br />
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I believe that all people deserve respect and to be treated equally and fairly. I believe that all lives matter. I believe in our rights to choose and live, and believe how we want. I believe all these things, and I support a lot of causes, but on top of my list I Back the Blue! Because He's my brother!<br />
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<br />Darci Uhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10026788615841665149noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6387804342725596076.post-36777586395856359762018-05-27T20:56:00.000-05:002018-05-27T20:59:32.043-05:00Twas the Night Before Camp!<div style="text-align: center;">
Camp Horizon 2018</div>
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Twas the night before camp and all through the grounds</div>
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The counselors were prepping and gathering 'round.</div>
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The cabins were prepped and signs hung with care</div>
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With great hopes that campers soon would be there.</div>
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The lawn was mowed and pool filled</div>
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Training now over, each counselor now skilled.</div>
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Praise band has practiced and a sang each song.</div>
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Schedules are set so no one is wrong!</div>
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Messy Games, Archery, Canoes, and more</div>
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The choices are many, so nothing is a bore!</div>
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Life Guards and Facilitators sigh</div>
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Their hours of training have flown on by!</div>
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Shaving Cream, Water Balloons, and Gummy Worms galore</div>
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The games we play are silly, that's for sure.</div>
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Water Bottles, Backpacks, Suscreen, & Bug-spray</div>
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Pack your bags now, there is no time to delay.</div>
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Tomorrow the campers will come</div>
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Car loads and buses, sound the drum!</div>
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Tonight we gather around to pray</div>
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Tomorrow is coming, oh what a day!</div>
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Go to bed early, and sleep tight!</div>
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Happy Camping to all, and to all a good night!</div>
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Darci Uhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10026788615841665149noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6387804342725596076.post-1162739947209120422018-03-25T19:11:00.001-05:002018-03-25T19:11:53.140-05:00A Psalm of ThanksgivingToday in Sunday School we were challenged to be like the Psalmist and write our own Psalm of Thanksgiving. So here is mine.<br />
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Abba, Father you are good.<br />
Your Grace abounds in unimaginable ways.<br />
Oh God you always provide for me.<br />
When I am broken and lost<br />
You reach out and guide me.<br />
Abba, I offer you my life<br />
I give you my praise.<br />
You know the inner darkness in my soul<br />
And even still you call me daughter.<br />
I cry out to you in anger and fear<br />
And you hear me and come to me.<br />
You never leave me in my despair<br />
You nurture and enrich my life<br />
So I may sing unto you.<br />
Abba, Father I thank you<br />
In the only way I can.<br />
Here is my life, my heart, my means<br />
Use me for your divine purpose<br />
Use me for your glory.Darci Uhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10026788615841665149noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6387804342725596076.post-3706127069773005372018-03-12T10:41:00.002-05:002018-03-12T10:41:23.335-05:00Blog Feature! It isn't very often that I get featured on someone else's blog! Super cool! Thanks Meg!<br />
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Go checkout her "Samuels Among Us" Series! And definitely read her book, "Bluebonnet Child"<br />
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<a href="http://www.thebluebonnetchild.com/2018/03/the-samuels-among-us-darci-utt.html">http://www.thebluebonnetchild.com/2018/03/the-samuels-among-us-darci-utt.html</a><br />
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I am so blessed to know Meg and her ministry, and I am very excited to see how her ministry and our ministry at Camp Horizon collide this summer!Darci Uhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10026788615841665149noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6387804342725596076.post-49101477543759431152018-03-07T13:51:00.001-06:002018-03-07T13:51:46.971-06:00Called, Blessed, Eternally Thankful!I have been feeling a nudge this week to get back to writing on my blog. It has been basically a year since I have written on here, except for about my daughter. When I started this blog it was to share my life of ministry with those around me and anyone who might happen upon it. It has always been my goal to authentically share God's love and Grace from my experience with the world. Well this past year, was a dark year in my life, and out of fear, self-doubt, and pure pain, I quit writing, I quit sharing.<br />
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In January 2017 I transitioned from a ministry that I loved dearly to one I didn't understand. I uprooted my family and settled us into a world of chaos. For the entire calendar year of 2017 I was miserable. I thought it was the fact that I had to leave Hesston, a town and church that I loved so deeply. I thought it was the fact that even after 50+ job applications my husband couldn't find a full time job, and then when he did, it wasn't even close to what he wanted. I thought it was the fact that I was drowning in bills I couldn't pay, avoiding debt collector phone calls, and contemplating finding a second job to make ends meet. I thought it was the fact that I was exhausted beyond words, trying to fit it all in. I thought it was the fact that my father had become incredibly ill, and witnessing that was hard for me. I thought it was the fact that my new summer schedule didn't include Performing Arts Camp like it had for 10 years. I thought was the fact that my office was separate from everyone else and I was lonely. I thought it was the fact that the kids in my ministry didn't care and didn't want a deep relationship with Christ (they actually do). I thought all of this and so, so much more. I even got to a point where I doubted my calling to be a mother, wondering why in the world God gave me this child, when I didn't really want to be a mom, and so many others, who are better at it want nothing more. Thinking back on that one, kills me inside. I am so called to be a mother. I am called to be Adah's mother! And I pray that I never doubt that again.<br />
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I have realized now that I am in 2018, and a different career and a different place all together, that it wasn't all of my circumstances that were making me miserable, it was me. I had become someone I didn't know. I had become dark, ugly, angry, and pathetic. I had lost sight of the beautiful child of God I am. I became a monster of my circumstances. I let the stress of living in this world deprive me of the joy of being called to something greater. I despised my husband, my child, my job, and more than anything myself.<br />
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I couldn't write about it, because I hadn't admitted it to myself yet. I look back at last year, and all I see now, is God. God held it all together. I had completely fallen apart. I am so thankful that I serve a God who listens to the deep inner groanings of my heart. The part of my soul that I was strangling, God was listening to.<br />
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For a year I was broke, and not just financially. And I am here to today to say that God brought me through it. God surrounded me with people who guided me and pushed me and pulled me through. From my family and friends to my co-workers, and even to the man I spent most of the year angry at! God brought me through it. I have a marriage, far from perfect, but a marriage with a man I truly love. We have together loved each other through our darkest moments in life. And we are together today, by the Grace of God, standing as a new couple with hearts on fire for the ministry we have been blessed with. I have an incredible daughter. Adah Grace will challenge me for the rest of my life, I don't doubt it, but oh how she loves me and I love her. The bond that she and I share is so much deeper than mother and daughter. She really is my beautiful ornament of grace and my constant reminder that I am here for such a divine purpose! I have a new job that I am in love with. God has returned me home to my hometown. He opened the door to the place where I really truly fell in love with Him. God brought me back to Camp Horizon! As the Program Director I get to live onsite, I get to serve incredible college students who are spending their summer pouring into young lives. I get to meet so many different people and I get to work with the most God-driven people I have ever been blessed to know. I get to go home to my parents house any time I want and I get to live and be at camp! Camp is where I met Adam, discovered my calling, fell in love with God, discovered the Holy Spirit, conquered my fears, tested my faith, and became who I am today. Adam and I get to live at the place where we got married! How awesome is that? And now the path is being laid for Adam to work with me at camp! Just when I thought it was as good as it could be, this is the final piece. The reason none of his other jobs worked out like we wanted them to, why his other dreams have failed. We were always meant to go home and together serve God in a ministry so much greater than ourselves! Today, I am bursting with the goodness of God! I am so incredibly blessed, eternally thankful, and forever a child of God, called to live my life in ministry with others!<br />
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<br />Darci Uhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10026788615841665149noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6387804342725596076.post-16400041556317405792017-12-13T10:16:00.001-06:002017-12-13T10:17:13.713-06:00The First Day vs. The Last DayWho would have thought the last day of Mom's Day Out Drop Off would be as hard for this mommy as the first day? Well it was, all of the things that are about to change are hardest because Adah has an incredible group of people here who love her and want to be a part of her life. If you haven't heard, we are moving again. I know, we seem to do that a lot! In January I start my dream job of working full time at Camp Horizon. This dream will also provide us housing and a life on camp! It really was a no brainer decision, but uprooting my child is still really hard. I don't know how people do this on a regular basis. I want to root her down and so she can grow in a community and feel like she belongs. So I'm going to actually dedicate this blog to all the incredible ways Mom's Day Out of Derby and Mulvane have been a huge God send for us this year.<br />
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Adah has learned:<br />
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<li>How to nap on a nap mat</li>
<li>How to eat lunch or be hungry but deal with whatever is put in front of her.</li>
<li>How to hold a pencil</li>
<li>How to sit in a chair at a table and wait</li>
<li>That adults can love her and take care of her and not give her 100% of their time</li>
<li>How to play with other children her age</li>
<li>How to only take one nap</li>
<li>Words, so, so many words</li>
<li>Arts and Crafts</li>
<li>Itsy Bitsy Spider</li>
<li>Dancing lots of dancing</li>
<li>And so much more!</li>
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Each week I wonder where did she learn that, and then think it had to be Mom's Day Out because I didn't teach her that. She has grown and changed so much this past year, and Mom's Day Out has been a vital part of this process. She loves her teachers, she loves going to school, and I love that they love her!</div>
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So here is to so many more firsts and lasts and vital relationships for my daughter. Change is hard, even when it is incredibly good change!</div>
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Thanks MDO for loving my baby who has turned into my toddler!!!<br />
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Each morning of MDO in Derby she has to stop in to talk to Lois and "help" her work. This was the first day and the last day of MDO in Derby!</div>
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Darci Uhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10026788615841665149noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6387804342725596076.post-77251186925987816692017-05-14T12:07:00.001-05:002017-05-14T12:07:34.800-05:00Mommy, Mommy I Need You<div dir="auto" style="background-color: white; color: #212121; font-family: wf_segoe-ui_normal, "Segoe UI", "Segoe WP", Tahoma, Arial, sans-serif, serif, EmojiFont; font-size: 15px;">
Mommy, Mommy I need you. If you are ever around my mother and I call her, that is what you'll hear. I remember rolling my eyes in college when she made me record that on her, I had done it on a previous phone as a joke. Now I scare her every single time I call her.</div>
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Today is my second Mother's Day as a mother. I have learned more about myself in this time as mommy than in any other role of my life. One thing I have realized is that there nothing in life that makes you feel more genuinely needed than parenthood, and obviously for me, motherhood. </div>
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From conception until about seven months old Adah needed me solely for life. She refused a bottle so it was on me, and as stressful and painful as it was at times, she needed me. She needed me on my good days and my bad, rested or exhausted, healthy or struggling. There were months that Adam would be jealous because she needed me, and my sleep deprived self just wanted a break. </div>
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Even now she needs me, I have more freedom now to let her stay the night somewhere else and she is fine, but the moment I return you can see it on her face she needs me. The first time I left her for a long period of time I walked in, and she looked up from playing, saw me, and fell apart. She collapsed into my arms and wanted only me for awhile. She needs me, and that is so beautiful because we are designed to need to be needed. Her need for me is incredibly fulfilling.</div>
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The other thing I have learned about motherhood, is it makes you incredibly needy. This independent, I can do it myself, woman has completely crumbled and I know without a doubt I cannot do it alone. I have a need for Adam that I didn't have before, I need him as a partner in raising our daughter, there are moments I literally can't handle one more scream or tantrum, and I need him to let me walk away. I need my mother, I don't know what I'm doing and she did a good job twice, so I call her often for help. I need "Nanny" Nicole, for her friendship and selfless ways of helping me mother are incredible and like no other. I need the village that loves my child like their own. I need God to guide me in raising His child to be the God-fearing woman she is supposed to be.</div>
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So to the little girl who kind of looks like me, thank you for needing me, and most of all, thank you for reminding me to rely on other people and not to try to do it on my own. Thank you for blessing me each and every day. </div>
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Darci Uhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10026788615841665149noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6387804342725596076.post-29480922027348907352017-03-12T10:35:00.001-05:002017-03-12T10:35:58.135-05:00Spirit Lead Me<p dir="ltr">"Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders." - Oceans by Hillsong</p>
<p dir="ltr">What happens when our trust is confined by our own desires and comfort zones? God calls us out onto the water in the moments when we are just getting comfortable in the boat.</p>
<p dir="ltr">We are not called to comfortable. We are called to move and breathe the Gospel to the world. The boat was meant to be a way to transport us to share God's grace, not the place we plant ourselves expecting others to come to us. Jesus never planted himself and expected people to come, he went and set among those he was trying to reach. We often allow the walls of our boat to become our home and our comfort. We allow those walls to separate us from the people we don't want to associate with. The very people God has called us to be present with. </p>
<p dir="ltr">Every now and then we might get brave and venture out on the water like Peter, and then we see just how scary and not safe it is, and fear starts to pull us under, and we lose that tiny faith we had moments ago. Jesus reaches down, and reminds us that there is no where we can go that He hasn't already been. Our faith may have limits but Christ's love does not. He isn't going to call us anywhere He isn't willing to go. He is calling us beyond the walls of our comfortable boat, out onto the waves to save His people from the storms of life. </p>
<p dir="ltr">Where is God calling your trust to go? Are you willing to leave the boat, or are you turning your row boat into a comfortable yacht? God has called you, are you willing to go where He sends? Let go of comfortable and get out of your boat, it's time to walk on water and go and make disciples!</p>
Darci Uhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10026788615841665149noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6387804342725596076.post-14891651222947566382017-01-30T11:34:00.000-06:002017-01-30T14:29:52.097-06:00Thanks For the Reminder, Adah!Dear Adah,<br />
Last night you didn't want to sleep. At all. I had youth group in Derby so you stayed home with Daddy. When I left you were napping, when I got home you were awake. You typically go to bed at 6;30pm this sounds miraculous to most people until they realize that you are again awake between 9 & 10 to nurse, and 1 & 2, and 4 & 5, and then you are awake around 6:30am. So last night when I got home at 10pm and heard you giggling in our bedroom with Daddy I knew it was going to be a long night. I went and grabbed you to see if I could nurse you back to sleep, since Daddy had tried to get you to go back to bed and it hadn't worked. Well I tried......<br />
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After all of these shenanigans I had to just put you in your crib and walk away at 11pm. You screamed for a minute and then you were out. Silly child of mine, I wish I understood you. I prayed that you would miraculously sleep until it was time to get up. But alas 1am came with your bloodcurdling screams. I went and nursed you like normal but then you thought it was time to play again, so back to your bed you went and you screamed yourself to sleep. Then we repeated this charade at 4am.<br />
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You ended up sleeping until 7:40am and I found myself wishing I had known so I could have slept in as well. You so unpredictable, you definitely keep me on my toes. I heard you moving and looked at the monitor and got up to go get you ready for you day at Grandma's. And this is how I found you....<br />
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Through all of this I couldn't help but laugh at you, I wanted to sleep so badly, I've been incredibly exhausted lately but watching your little face so full of life snapped me out of my sleepy trance and into the blessed life we live. I just wanted to say thank you for reminding me that life is about more than getting things done, and getting enough rest, but finding the joy of God's grace in all the little moments, even if it is 4 in the morning!!! :)<br />
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I love you sweet pea! Never stop reminding me, please, and thank you! Although you can sleep tonight, that would be great!!! :)<br />
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Love,<br />
MommyDarci Uhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10026788615841665149noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6387804342725596076.post-85496982207747737902017-01-20T10:20:00.000-06:002017-01-20T10:20:12.247-06:00Through All of It!<span style="font-family: inherit;">I have decided that life <b>is</b> a time of transition, so to say that I am in a time of transition is true, but not just for me, for everyone. I think there are times that the transitions seem bigger than others, but it is always changing and each day is a new journey.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">January first I changed jobs, something I thought I would never do again. In 2012 when I joined the ministry team at Hesston UMC I had no intentions of leaving, I intended to make that my church home. And I did. I started there as a single young woman in youth ministry. They saw me through dating, engagement, marriage, and my first child. To say that I fell in love with the congregation and the town is an understatement. There have been so many times over the past year that I have looked around and thought I am so blessed to raise my daughter here, I want her to always know these people, I am so blessed to call this my home. So when it became evident to my soul that God was turning the page on my Hesston chapter of life, I was hurt and angry. Not really angry at God but at the people in Hesston who were not holding on to me but were letting me go. I was mad because there is this incredible group of students that call Hesston UMC home and they have challenged me, encouraged me, and enriched my soul in so many ways over the past 5 years. The current group of high schoolers are so near and dear to my heart and my husbands that even editing my resume to move on was heartbreaking and done through so many tears. The idea of not raising Adah to be a Swather was so overwhelming at times I couldn't help but break down. How was it that I was so loudly called to go to Hesston and yet when it came time to leave my heart wasn't ready to go? The past couple of months I have lived in between being excited about what God is leading me to and so incredibly sad that all I can do is cry.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Well I have been in Derby now for 20 days. This has flown by, so fast. The first week I would drive down and be incredibly excited to be here and have an awesome day and then I would drive home and by the time I got back to Hesston the tears were flowing and the heartache was all I could see again. That first week I had to go back to the church in Hesston to a dinner so the church could have a chance to tell me bye. This was the most awkward, rewarding, heartbreaking thing I have ever done. I was angry with this congregation for not fighting for me, and then someone said, "I'm mad at you for leaving," I wanted to scream, "YOU'RE MAD????" Then I turned around and someone would embrace me in tears with a thank you and you're such a blessing and I bit my tongue and my cheeks because I was NOT going to cry again. Then I turned around again as Adah giggled and ran around chasing and playing with the kids and youth that have become her normal. And I would let out a sigh through tear filled eyes, and make eye contact with my husband who gave a reassuring hand squeeze, and we pushed through the night. I got home, put Adah to bed, and then I cried. I mean I wept. My soul screamed out to God in pain and anger and sadness. Then I fell asleep and woke up the next day basically a shell of who I have been and I went to a youth worker meeting. By the time I got home, I was breaking down again. But somewhere in all the tears on Wednesday and Thursday, I went from being the Youth & Discipleship Minister at Hesston UMC to being the Director of Youth Ministries at Woodlawn UMC in Derby. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">I never wanted to leave, but I am so incredibly happy to be here. Here in Derby I have found a new home for my wounded soul. I have healed and am already falling in love with this church and the souls who call it home. I am greeted each day with excited faces to see what God is going to do with me and the youth ministry here. Adah is one, she will fall in love with the people here faster than I am, and her little soul will be nurtured here in ways that Hesston couldn't provide. Through all of this experience (so this school year) there is one verse that has become my new mantra. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">"<span style="background-color: white; font-size: 16px;">We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure." - Hebrews 6:19a</span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I am forever grateful for my time in Hesston and all the beautiful souls that will always be near and dear to my heart. I am also thankful to them for letting me go and find a new home. I am thankful for Derby for welcoming me in so openly and kindly that part of me feels like I have always been here. I'm so excited for the things that God is doing here.</span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Our lives here on Earth may always be changing but no matter what Jesus is here as our anchor holding us in place, through the winds and rains and the waves we can't see past. We have to remember that an anchor does it's best work when it is under the water where we cannot see it. If you find yourself today in the middle of a storm hold on, if your hope is in the Lord and your Faith is in Him then your anchor is right where it needs to be. Even if you can't see past the waves, God can!</span></span><br />
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Through All of It - Colton Dixon</div>
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I Will Rise - Chris Tomlin</div>
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As long as Jesus is my anchor, it will always be well with my soul! How goes it with Your soul?Darci Uhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10026788615841665149noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6387804342725596076.post-63348619900418742152017-01-11T14:13:00.000-06:002017-01-11T14:26:16.250-06:00Love Thy Neighbor #WoodlawnAlive<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
This afternoon a very controversial church in Kansas is choosing to spend their God given time to protest with a message of hate to the students at Derby High School. We chose to respond with love. As a church that is part of the Derby community we wanted our students to know that we love them and care about them and support them, no matter what their stance is on a very political issue. In the hope to share even an ounce of God's Unconditional Agape Love, we are having a Celebration of God's Love Event. Inviting students and adults to come together and share in the love of Christ that flows from Calvary.</div>
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God does not call us to pick and choose who we want to love but to love everyone unconditionally. That was His greatest commandment. To Love Thy Neighbor as Thyself!!!Darci Uhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10026788615841665149noreply@blogger.com1